"Changes, Choices, and Challenges"
by Rev. Kimi Riegel
June 6, 2004

Note: This was a homily written and delivered by Kimi Riegel at this year's Coming of Age service. The topic was chosen by the three 13-year-old youth in this year's program.

Choices are what make us human. Each choice answers one of the challenges we face and presents more thus taking us from change to change. Many philosophers and people you will study through your life time have taken these three topics and written on them ad nausea and most often unintelligibly, but you will find that out soon enough.

One of my favorites of these guys was Kierkegaard. He is credited with the phrase “life can be only understood backwards, but it must be lived forward,” which means we have to make much of the choices we make with limited information. You will decide which school to go to, which person to live with, what career path to follow and what religious tradition to follow among a million other smaller decisions each day. In most of those you will not have a crystal ball and you will not know what will happen until it does. It has been true for your parents.

Kierkegaard wrote many books but two of the titles were, “Either/or” and “Fear and Trembling”. Those words pretty much sum up his understanding of changes, choices and challenges. We must decide and it is often with fear and trembling that we move forward. That is true for all of us. Remember nothing else I tell you today about changes, choices and challenges, but remember that we all experience fear and trembling when making importance choices.

No one can make your choices for you. Many people will have opinions and even suggest that they have the answers to your life, but in the end it will always be your choice. In the end it will be your choice and your consequences.

That was the one “c” word you left out of my assignment. Consequences. You see Kierkegaard also said that “the most painful state of living is remembering the future.” No matter what choice we make there will be consequences. We can’t avoid them. If you pick one school there will be others you will not. If you marry one person there will be others you will not – hopefully. And so it is; choices make changes and challenges and consequences.

One of my favorite little books is called “The Holy Man” It is several short stories about a Holy man, named Joe, living high in the mountains that people wait in line days to see. When the door was opened they would say they had come to see the Holy Man. “Follow me, please,” would say the little man as he lead them very quickly through the house. They would come to a large door much like the one they entered. It was the back door. The monk would open it wide and say, “Goodbye.” “But, I have come to see the Holy Man.” “You have seen me,” he would reply and they would find the door closed behind them. Now all this moving through the house was exhausting so once in a while he would rest for 5 minutes and talk with one of the pilgrims. The short stories are those 5 minute conversations. One is called choices.

“I have so many troubles,” said a man in his early 40s. “Nothing goes right in my life, I fight with all the people in my life, first my father now my wife, even my children and dog ill-treat me.”

The Holy Man listened as the man went on and on, finally, during a pause, he asked, “How do you feel about your height?”

“My height? I don’t think about it.” He frowned. “My height? My height is alright.”

“For those of us who are not born into an inescapable prison of poverty and disease,” said the holy man, “there is a world of choice open to us. I have reflected long upon this matter and now understand that the only ting we have no choice about in life is our height. That is the only thing that is a given. We get to complain about our height and that is all.”

“That would be a silly thing to complain about,” said the pilgrim from his lofty stance of having so many things to protest.

“Yes, very silly, since we can’t do anything about it.” Joe smiled, “But not so silly as complaining about all the troubles in our lives we can choose to change.”

And he showed the man the door.

Choices are what make us human. We will have changes and challenges and yes even consequences. But it is our choices that make us who we are. May you make wise and wonderful choices.